Everywhere Else in College Football

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Last updated: 10/14/2013 2:37 AM
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Football
Elsewhere in College Football
By John Kreinbihl

One of the best parts of Saturday College Football is checking all the scores on Sunday.  It’s become a bit of a ritual each Sunday morning when I grab the sports section from the newspaper and my laptop—yes, I still get a newspaper delivered to my home, but by using both I strive to find that perfect balance between yesterday’s form of communication and today’s digital world.  It’s the same reason I have a black and white monitor on my I-phone.  I check both the paper and the web for as many of the college football scores as I can while I am, as Mr. Ed superbly references it, “interviewing Dick LeBeau”—he’ll have to tell you the story—and look for simple oddities like widest winning margin; most point by a losing team; fewest points by wining team, etc.

What you are about to read are some of the tidbits that rose to the top for me today.

Biggest Blow-out
Not to the level of OSU-FAMU, but there were some cakewalks Saturday and not surprisingly, a SEC team was near the top of the list.  Auburn beat Western Carolina 62-3.  Elsewhere, Heidelberg downed capital 73-17 but as they say down on the farm, the biggest spread, was 62 points.  Mt Union beat Wilmington 62-0 and N.W. Missouri State ran through Central Oklahoma 72-10.

Lowest Wining Score
College of New Jersey 7 Kean 0.  I tried to find a box score from this game but the only thing I could find online was a game note that read, “We think somebody scored, but we’re not sure because Ed was down getting a hot dog”.

Most Points in a Losing Effort
Hats off this week to Western Connecticut.  The Colonials lost to Mass-Maritime 54-53...in regulation.  Get this.  These two teams put up 1,282 yards in total offense.  Mass-Maritime ran 97 plays.  Western Connecticut ran 76 plays, 42 of which, or  55%, went to RB Octavias McKoy.  McKoy ran for 375 and 5 TD’s.  1,004 people thought this was the best way to spend a Saturday afternoon and they were probably right.

Fewest Points Scored by One Team That Actually Scored
Three. I found five teams that only scored three points—St. Vincent; Colgate; W. Carolina in the aforementioned Auburn game; Nebraska Wesleyan and Lamar.

Name Games of the Week
Washington and Jefferson over Thomas More 45-21 and Hardin-Simmons beat Howard Payne 59-24.  I think in two weeks William and Mary plays Ted and Alice.

Initial Successes
LSU, BYU and TCU each won.

Initial Failures
RPI, WPI and IUP didn’t.  RPI (Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute) lost to St. Lawrence 20-13.  St Lawrence scored with 5:33 left in the 3rd quarter and it was R.I.P. for RPI.  I wonder if RPI has a Rating Percentage Index?  At 3-2 what would RPI’s RPI be?  It’s questions like that you need a fact checker for. Disclaimer: I don't have a fact checker.

When Tufts Gets Going…
Apparently, the going gets tough.  Tufts University, the Jumbos—how awesome is that—fell to Trinity on Saturday 43-7.  Tufts took a 7-0 lead early in the game on a nine play, ninety-nine yard drive only to have Trinity return the ensuing kick-off 99 yards for a TD.  Trinity also had two pick-6’s in the game.  I believe the Jumbos got over confident and let up after the first score to catch the matinee of Captain Phillips.  Spoiler alert, if you’ve seen the trailer, you’ve seen the movie.

Faith wasn’t enough.  Maybe hope and charity are
This game supposedly happened.  College of Faith lost to Clark Atlanta 56-0.  When I Googled these two schools here are the web site messages I discovered—College of Faith Athletics page said “coming soon” and Clark Atlanta’s site had not been updated since April 9, 2011.  I’m serious.  Check for yourself.  This nonsense will still be here when you get back.

Directional Game of the Week
A second recognition to N. W. Missouri State for their 72-10 win over Central Oklahoma.  Our runner-up was N. Texas 34 Middle Tennessee 7.

If it Wasn’t for College Football, Would We Not Have Brats and Beer?
For the 20th most populated state in the USA, Wisconsin has way too many college football teams.  On Saturday, as you know, regular Wisconsin beat Northwestern 35-6, but did you know Wisconsin-Whitewater downed Wisconsin-Stout 55-13 in a game that was as cool and refreshing as it sounds?   Whitewater still has to play Wisconsin Pale Ale and Wisconsin Lite.  Wisconsin-Stevens Point beat Wisconsin- Eau Claire 23-17 in Eau-ver time. Wisconsin-River Falls falls to Wisconsin-Plattsvile  49-7 and Wisconsin-Oshkosh, the Fighting B’Goshes, defeated Wisconsin- La Crosse 30-6.  I hope Oshkosh’s unis are cute little bib overalls.

Two if by Sea 
Florida Atlantic lost.  Azusa Pacific won.

Yes, really
Salve Regina 47 Western New England 26.  I saw this score and immediately needed to know more because it couldn’t have been real.  On the surface this was a game between an ointment from Saskatchewan and a very vague geographic description but Salve Regina University and Western New England University actually exist.  I assume WNEU took their name because “We’re Right Over Here” College was taken but this game was real and 2,115 folks witnessed it.

And Finally…
A special recognition to Washington (MO) for defeating Hendrix 45-41 only after Hendrix politely excused themselves from the field to “kiss the sky”.

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