Tony's Tip Sheet

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Last updated: 10/10/2013 2:25 PM
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Football
Tony's Tip Sheet – National Edition
by Tony Gerdeman

As a nation we have been short-changed of college football upsets to this point in the season, and it's just not right. This is America. We want to see the best teams humbled before us and beg for our forgiveness. This is why we watch college football, isn't it?

That comeuppance may happen in a game or two this week, and it won't come a minute too soon. After all, we paid for blood, and it's beyond time for our lust to be sated.

But even if the upsets don't come, it's still better than watching playoff baseball.

Thursday October 10

Teams: Rutgers (4-1) at #8 Louisville (5-0)
Time (TV): 7:30 pm (ESPN)
Interest: 4
Cheer For: Rutgers

These next two weeks will be the toughest two weeks for Louisville football. This week it's Rutgers and next week it's UCF, both in Louisville. As we saw, UCF is good enough to beat Penn State (but so is Indiana), and Rutgers is good enough to beat Arkansas (but who isn't?). Rutgers beat SMU 55-52 last week in overtime, which means they'll give up at least 40 points to Louisville. The interesting part for me will be how many points Rutgers can score, given that Louisville is only allowing 6.8 points per game so far. The Cardinals haven't played anybody yet, and the fact that Rutgers is finally considered somebody is just as damning to their schedule as anything else. Do you think Rutgers will get that same respect next year in the Big Ten? Louisville 45 – Rutgers 21

Teams: Arizona (3-1) at USC (3-2)
Time (TV): 10:30 pm (FS1)
Interest: 2.5
Cheer For: USC

USC will be playing their first game since head coach Lane Kiffin was fired, which means this will probably the best Trojans team we have seen in years. Arizona can't throw the ball, and the USC defense should be able to stop the run. This game shouldn't be that close, which is just further testament to how harmful Kiffin was to the USC football program. Kiffin was the worst punishment the NCAA has ever handed down. In fact, Alabama better stop having coaches pay players, or else the NCAA could put the Kiff Penalty on them as well. USC 24 – Arizona 13

Saturday October 12

Teams: #12 Oklahoma (5-0) vs Texas (3-2) (Dallas, TX)
Time (TV): 12:00 pm (ABC)
Interest: 2
Cheer For: Texas

Poor Texas. They are going to be stomped like a bug, and their big, tall cowboy hat is going to get so ruined. Wait, who am I kidding? They've gotten beaten up enough to know to remove their hat before a fight. That actually describes Texas football pretty well – always getting beaten up, but still looking dapper before and after. And then they go home to their big house and big-haired wife and talk about how much money they made that day, leaving out the part about BYU running through them like a tunnel. Texas' wife stays away from the television because it's impossible to follow when she's always on Valium; and besides, they don't get the Longhorn Network in their house, so Texas' reputation is safe. Oklahoma 37 – Texas 21

Teams: #25 Missouri (5-0) at #7 Georgia (4-1)
Time (TV): 12:00 pm (ESPN)
Interest: 3.5
Cheer For: Georgia

You should be cheering for Georgia because even though they're dealing with injuries right now, they're probably your best chance to beat Alabama in the SEC Championship Game. Unfortunately, everybody on the UGA football team is injured right now. The team doctor even tore an ACL giving the team their annual scoliosis test this week. Seven different players fell down the stairs on the StairMaster this week and won't be able to play. One player dislocated a shoulder when he foolishly slammed into a teammate's shoulder (that teammate's shoulder was dislocated, and the player was trying to pop it back in with his own shoulder.) Georgia is giving up 32 points per game, so Missouri is going to be able to score. The question is will the Bulldogs be able to keep up without their top two running backs and top three receivers? I'll side with Aaron Murray, but I'm not happy about it. With a win, Missouri will jump up at least a dozen spots in the polls. Georgia 41 – Missouri 34

Teams: #14 South Carolina (4-1) at Arkansas (3-3)
Time (TV): 12:21 pm (SECTV)
Interest: 3.5
Cheer For: Arkansas

I just realized that this could be the beginning of the best coaching feud in America. I think I'm going to spend the next few days spreading rumors on Twitter about what Steve Spurrier has been saying about Bret Bielema, because you know there's no way Bielema will be able to stop himself from responding. If the rest of this Tip Sheet is lacking, it's because I'm just rushing through so I can get it done and then turn to my Twitter scheme. And if you think it's not lacking, it's because you don't expect much. South Carolina 28 – Arkansas 27

Teams: #17 Florida (4-1) at #10 LSU (5-1)
Time (TV): 3:30 pm (CBS)
Interest: 4
Cheer For: Florida

Florida is on an upswing right now because of junior quarterback Tyler Murphy – an Urban Meyer signee. Murphy has the Gator offense moving the ball pretty well, and it's not like they have had to move it much because their defense has been outstanding. However, I think LSU will be able to move the ball even better than Florida, as quarterback Zach Mettenberger has given the Tigers a complete offense. I'm going with the home-field advantage because nobody should trust Will Muschamp to ever do anything correctly on the road. LSU 24 – Florida 17

Teams: #15 Baylor (4-0) at Kansas State (2-3)
Time (TV): 3:30 pm (FOX)
Interest: 3.5
Cheer For: Kansas State

Baylor is averaging around 125 points per game this season, but they have yet to play a team who fields an 11-person defense. Or one whose defense doesn't feature monkeys riding on horseback. Now I'm not saying Kansas State is a monkey-less defense, but I am saying that maybe their horses are a little more athletic than the other defenses Baylor has faced. I want to see how well Kansas State holds up. This could be the first time Baylor quarterback Bryce Petty sees a fourth quarter. He's usually napping by the middle of the third. Baylor 59 – Kansas State 31

Teams: Boston College (3-2) at #3 Clemson (5-0)
Time (TV): 3:30 pm (ABC/ESPN2)
Interest: 1
Cheer For: Boston College

Boston College's two losses this season have come to USC (35-7) and Florida State (48-34), so this will be their best loss to date. For Boston College, quality losses are all they have to hang on to. In fact, their 48-34 loss to Florida State is their best win in about four years. Clemson 52 – Boston College 24

Teams: #2 Oregon (5-0) at #16 Washington (4-1)
Time (TV): 4:00 pm (FS1)
Interest: 5
Cheer For: Washington

Oregon is favored by 14 in this game, which is a pretty high compliment to Washington. This will be the first test for the Ducks this year, and the Huskies are only giving up 14.8 points per game this season. Quarterback Keith Price and running back Bishop Sankey should be able to score on anybody, and Washington has shown an ability to stop the teams they've faced to this point – though they did give up 31 points to Stanford. I think the key will be Washington withstanding Oregon's first quarter punching. If they can do that, then this could be a game for all four quarters. Oregon 49 – Washington 38

Teams: #5 Stanford (5-0) at Utah (3-2)
Time (TV): 6:00 pm (P12N)
Interest: 2.5
Cheer For: Utah

Utah is 0-2 in conference play, with a 51-48 overtime loss to Oregon State and a 34-27 loss to UCLA. Those are two pretty good losses, so there is a chance for an upset here. However, that's just the type of talking up that everybody else will do to this game, so there's no need for me to do it as well. I don't like doing my own work, so there's no way I'm doing somebody else's. Stanford 34 – Utah 24

Teams: #1 Alabama (5-0) at Kentucky (1-4)
Time (TV): 7:00 pm (ESPN2)
Interest: 1.5
Cheer For: Kentucky

Alabama is going to go into Lexington and not be amazing. They'll win by enough, but they won't be as perfect as everyone hopes and assumes they'll be. Don't get me wrong, they'll still be rude guests. They're basically going to spend three hours on Kentucky's porch, and every piece of furniture on that porch is going to be broken. The three-person swing? Forget it, it's gonna get broke. The old couch from the back room? Gone. The encyclopedias under the left front corner acting as legs? Pitched. Yes, even the papasan from the garage – all shot. And that shopping cart that somehow showed up one Saturday night? It will be fine, don't worry. Alabama 38 – Kentucky 14

Teams: #9 Texas A&M (4-1) at Ole Miss (3-2)
Time (TV): 8:30 pm (ESPN)
Interest: 2
Cheer For: Ole Miss

Ole Miss is an upstart SEC program because people who are paid to promote the SEC say they are. The Rebels, meanwhile, have lost their last two SEC games, getting shut out by Alabama and then losing last week at Auburn. If that's upstart, then why don't more people talk about those upstart Golden Gophers? Or the upstart Washington Generals. They've got spunk! If Ole Miss wants to prove the hopers right, then they'll win this game. If they can't, at least the collective SEC media will have Missouri to focus on instead. Texas A&M 38 – Ole Miss 27

Teams: California (1-4) at #11 UCLA (4-0)
Time (TV): 10:30 pm (ESPN2)
Interest: 2.5
Cheer For: California

UCLA is going to win this one pretty easily. California will throw for a ton of yards, but the only people who care about that are Ohio State fans. UCLA 48 – California 24

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