Bruce Arians: Paint Drinker
He had me fooled. When I see someone wearing a kangol hat on the sidelines, I don't think "that guy definitely drinks paint". If you lined up every head football coach (college or NFL) in the country and asked, "which one of these guys drank paint as a kid", Bruce would be one of the last ones picked along with Bill Snyder. Never judge a book by his kangol, folks.
This is the first thing I thought of after reading this.
Barely survived Martinique last night. I know we're playing the 'C' squad, but we ought to be able to take care of Martinique.