Welcome to Week Eight. The most dangerous week of the year.
I don’t know if that’s true, but now you’re imagining the games dressed in leather jackets with spiky leather bracelets.
Wait.
Now you’re imagining the week as Grease.
You’ve gone too far towards the leather and strayed from dangerous yet again.
Well, there’s no bringing you back now.
Not even a great introduction will be able to do it, so why even try.
Let’s just get to who you should be rooting for this week.
Saturday October 20
Teams: #6 Michigan (6-1, 4-0) at #24 Michigan State (4-2, 2-1)
Time (TV): 12:00 pm (FOX)
Interest: 5
Cheer For: Michigan
You should be rooting for a Michigan win, just like every week, but I know the allure of the Mark Dantonio Victory Smirk will be too much for you to fight. I get it. I’m not going to ask you to do something that is going to cause you pain. Jim Harbaugh and the Wolverines are favored by a touchdown, which makes sense if you’ve watched either team play the last few weeks. Harbaugh is 1-2 against MSU, with the only win coming two years ago in East Lansing. Interestingly, even though this is Michigan’s eighth game of the season, it is only their third road game. The first road game was a 24-17 loss at Notre Dame and their second road game was a 20-17 win at Northwestern. The Wildcats scored the first 17 points of the game, by the way. Against the Irish, Michigan went down 14-0. If they go down two touchdowns this weekend, I don’t know if they’ll have enough of what it takes to win. Sparty leads the nation in run defense, allowing just 62.3 yards per game. We’ll see if Ed Warinner’s offensive line is really as good as Michigan fans are starting to think it is. It’s too bad I’ll be listening to this one in the car on the way to West Lafayette.
Michigan 24 – Michigan State 17
Teams: #9 Oklahoma (5-1, 2-1) at TCU (3-3, 1-2)
Time (TV): 12:00 pm (ABC)
Interest: 2.5
Cheer For: TCU
Ever since Ohio State got a TOP 15 WIN AGAINST TCU earlier in the season, the Horned Frogs have taken a dip. You’ll want them to pick things back up starting this week, but even with a loss to Oklahoma, the Buckeyes will still have had a TOP 15 WIN AGAINST TCU this season.
Oklahoma 42 – TCU 24
Teams: Maryland (4-2, 2-1) at #19 Iowa (5-1, 2-1)
Time (TV): 12:00 pm (ESPN2)
Interest: 2.5
Cheer For: Iowa
You are cheering for Iowa over Maryland here for a couple of reasons. First, you want Iowa in the Big Ten Championship Game. Second, you don’t want Maryland going on some kind of run and getting full of themselves before Ohio State comes to town. The Hawkeyes are only favored by nine points, which seems odd given how effective their rush defense has been this year. Iowa is No. 3 in the nation in that category, allowing just 81.5 yards rushing per game. Maryland is third in the B1G in rushing (245 ypg), but 125th in the nation in passing (120.5 ypg). They are the lowest-ranked non-triple-option offense in that category. I don’t foresee many Terp points here.
Iowa 31 – Maryland 14
Teams: Illinois (3-3, 1-0) at #23 Wisconsin (4-2, 2-1)
Time (TV): 12:00 pm (FS1)
Interest: 2
Cheer For: Wisconsin
Wisconsin needs to bounce back and show that their loss to Michigan last week was merely an act of kindness towards a program that had fallen on hard times. The Badgers were at a CVS the week before when they noticed the Wolverines standing outside asking people for spare aspirin. Wisconsin felt terrible for them and so they gave them the best pain reliever they could think of — a win in the Big House. No, it wasn’t a win on the road against a ranked team, but the Badgers aren’t miracle workers.
Wisconsin 41 – Illinois 17
Teams: Auburn (4-3, 1-3) at Ole Miss (5-2, 1-2)
Time (TV): 12:00 pm (ESPN)
Interest: 1
Cheer For: Auburn
One of the great traditions in the SEC takes place annually in week eight at every conference game. At halftime of each game, fans from both sides meet on the field and have a Burt Reynolds “Quote Off.” Each school has fans quote Burt Reynolds movies until somebody can’t come up with a quote. The halftime of Florida-Alabama in 2014 lasted 14 hours. It’s in the Guinness Book of World Records for seventh-longest halftime of a Burt Reynolds Quote Off at an SEC game on record!
Ole Miss 37 – Auburn 31
Teams: Northwestern (3-3, 3-1) at Rutgers (1-6, 0-4)
Time (TV): 12:00 pm (BTN)
Interest: 1
Cheer For: Northwestern
At this point, there is probably no reason to root for Rutgers in order to bolster Ohio State’s win. Now you’ll just want to avoid anybody else losing to them because that would make the rest of the Big Ten look bad. Northwestern pulled off a heist at home against Nebraska last week, which is their second-straight theft after giving a game away to Michigan three weeks ago. The Wildcats are due for a loss, but asking Rutgers to handle it is a lot like asking your curtains to put out the fire in your living room. If Chris Ash is going to keep his job, he might want to start keeping it right now.
Northwestern 24 – Rutgers 14
Teams: Virginia (4-2, 2-1) at Duke (5-1, 1-1)
Time (TV): 12:30 pm (ACCN)
Interest: 1
Cheer For: Virginia
Virginia and Duke is one of the fiercest rivalries in the South. They play for the prestigious R.J. Reynolds Cup, which causes lung cancer but looks kind of cool when you’re holding it.
Duke 37 – Virginia 27
Teams: #1 Alabama (7-0, 4-0) at Tennessee (3-3, 1-2)
Time (TV): 3:30 pm (CBS)
Interest: 2.5
Cheer For: Tennessee
Tennessee is 4-0 against teams from Alabama not named Alabama or Auburn this century. If that’s not domination over an entire state, I don’t know what is. Even though this game will likely be destruction on a global scale for Tennessee, the Vols have had some close games against the Tide recently. In 2015, Bama escaped with a 19-14 win in Tuscaloosa. Since that game, however, Alabama has beaten Tennessee like they asked to put ketchup on a steak. If the Vols are a thing that exists, then let’s see that existence this weekend. Alabama’s defense has not been great this year and Tennessee quarterback Jarrett Guarantano is coming off of the best game of his career last week at Auburn. The Vols are a 29-point underdog. I don’t see Alabama covering.
Alabama 41 – Tennessee 20
Teams: #16 North Carolina State (5-0, 2-0) at #3 Clemson (6-0, 3-0)
Time (TV): 3:30 pm (ESPN)
Interest: 5
Cheer For: North Carolina State
This is the first real game for the Wolfpack this season. A week three game against West Virginia was canceled due to weather, and the best win this season has been against Virginia or Boston College, both of which came at home. Now NC State goes on the road to face a No. 3 Clemson team that is favored by 17.5 points. Some people like NC State’s chances because of quarterback Ryan Finley and the Tigers’ shaky secondary. Because this is the only interesting game at 3:30, I’m hoping it will be close, but I think we all know that nobody cares about our hopes.
Clemson 38 – North Carolina State 27
Teams: Colorado (5-1, 2-1) at #15 Washington (5-2, 3-1)
Time (TV): 3:30 pm (FOX)
Interest: 2
Cheer For: Colorado
Do you care about this game? If you do, then I apologize. It’s 6:30 pm on a Friday night and I still have other stuff to do. I’m 24 hours behind on this and, let’s be honest, this Tip Sheet is pretty underwhelming. This game isn’t helping and the ones below it won’t help either. I realize I am underperforming right now, but at least I’m taking a long time doing it. Colorado receiver Laviska Shenault is a bit banged up, but my fantasy team is praying that he’ll be okay to play.
Washington 27 – Colorado 26
Teams: #18 Penn State (4-2, 1-2) at Indiana (4-3, 1-3)
Time (TV): 3:30 pm (ABC)
Interest: 2.5
Cheer For: Penn State
It’s unfortunate, but Penn State’s season is now over thanks to home losses against Ohio State and Michigan State. Indiana is a 7-point win at Rutgers away from being 0-4 in Big Ten play this season. After this game, Penn State hosts Iowa and then travels to Michigan, who will be coming off of a bye. This schedule is such crap and if you ask me, Penn State should look at leaving the Big Ten and joining the ACC. And I’m not just saying that because I want the Big Ten to invite UCF to replace PSU so that I can travel to Florida every other year in November. Also, I think it would be cool if Ohio State could have a second rival in the conference.
Penn State 34 – Indiana 24
Teams: Minnesota (3-3, 0-3) at Nebraska (0-6, 0-4)
Time (TV): 3:30 pm (BTN)
Interest: 2.5
Cheer For: Minnesota
You are cheering for Minnesota, but you’ll be happy when Nebraska finally wins this week. They have been close several times this season, including last week at Northwestern. Minnesota played about as well as they could last week at Ohio State, so it will be interesting to see how they bounce back this week. Last week was a heartbreaker for the Huskers, but they’ll have the home crowd behind them this week. Expect a pretty decent game from Nebraska quarterback Adrian Martinez.
Nebraska 30 – Minnesota 20
Teams: #22 Mississippi State (4-2, 1-2) at #5 LSU (6-1, 3-1)
Time (TV): 7:00 pm (ESPN)
Interest: 3.5
Cheer For: LSU
If LSU is going to stay on track with Alabama, they’ll need to win this game. The Tigers are only favored by 6.5 points, which is kind of odd. Also kind of odd is the fact that the No. 1 baby name in Louisiana for the second half of 2018 is Jeaux. The No. 7 name is Carugula. That must be a family name. And a very large family. Like everybody else in the SEC, Mississippi State has beaten Auburn, but they have losses to Florida and Kentucky. LSU, meanwhile, is coming off of a 36-16 win last week against No. 2 Georgia. Is there a hangover in Baton Rouge this week? If so, they should just go right back to the hair of the (bull)dog.
LSU 24 – Mississippi State 16
Teams: #2 Ohio State (7-0, 4-0) at Purdue (3-3, 2-1)
Time (TV): 7:30 pm (ABC)
Interest: 5
Cheer For: Ohio State
The Ohio State defense will face its toughest test of the year, aside from all of their other tough tests. The Buckeyes have proven everything they’ve needed to prove to this point, but this is another opportunity to shut people up. Unfortunately for them, they haven’t really capitalized on many of those previous opportunities. Still, they are 7-0 and you are not. Purdue is absolutely good enough to make Ohio State 7-1, but the Buckeyes are also absolutely good enough to send the Boilers back to the drawing board. The fact that this game can go in any number of ways is what makes it so fun, assuming you find ulcers and stomach acid a real good time.
Ohio State 45 – Purdue 27
Teams: #12 Oregon (5-1, 2-1) at #25 Washington State (5-1, 2-1)
Time (TV): 7:30 pm (FOX)
Interest: 3
Cheer For: Washington State
It doesn’t matter who you cheer for here, so root for the team that best exemplifies the person you want to be. Do you want to be a duck or do you want to be a cougar? In elementary school, I once did a presentation on cougars. I used the set of World Book Encyclopedias that we had at home. Sure, it was the ’80s and the encyclopedias were from 1961, but nothing had really changed in cougar technology in those 25 years. At least that’s what President John F. Kennedy said. Anyway, my presentation used a poster board and I also employed index cards, so it was pretty professional. I don’t remember what kind of grade I got, but I didn’t do it for the grade. I did it to honor the largest cat that cannot roar. I did it to show respect for an animal that can make a standing bound of 20 feet. I didn’t do it for some lame ducks that can’t even make a sound that actually echoes.
Washington State 44 – Oregon 38