I am just one person. One human male. Nothing to write home about.
When it comes to predictions, however, I am one of the best in the world that I am aware of. And plenty of people write home about me.
Kids who are off to college whose only means of contact with a parent is through the U.S. Mail frequently write their loved ones of my predicting exploits.
Father and Mother,
College is going great. Did you see Tony Gerdeman correctly predict that J.T. Barrett would complete a pass of at least 30 yards through the air? The pass went just 31 yards, but it still counted. It was almost as if he knew. It was truly the most memorable part of my first month in college, other than the fact that our residential advisor busted us for having alcohol in the dorms. You should be receiving another letter soon about that. But anyway, 31 yards!
With love always,
I am also big in Europe and Asia and other 80s band names.
How did I do last week? About as well as you’d expect.
1. The Buckeyes will have at least two interceptions.
Outcome: Nailed it. Damon Webb and Dante Booker each had picks.
2. J.T. Barrett will complete a pass that travels at least 33 yards in the air.
Outcome: Nailed it. I didn’t do the measuring, but I’m sure the 70-yarder to Johnnie Dixon went at least 33 yards in the air. I know some of you will go and check the tape because you hate to see me be right nearly most of the time some of the time, but you’ll be disappointed after doing the math.
3. Ohio State will hold Rutgers to under 200 yards of total offense.
Outcome: Failed it. Rutgers managed 209 yards of total offense, with 81 of those yards coming in the fourth quarter. Sixty of those yards happened on Rutgers’ final drive, which shouldn’t even count. They gained 21 yards on their final four plays from scrimmage. Thanks guys.
4. The Buckeyes will have their longest punt return of the season.
Outcome: Nailed it. The season long coming into this game was seven yards and K.J. Hill matched that number with a dazzling and majestic 7-yard return against Rutgers.
5. Jerome Baker will have at least two tackles for loss.
Outcome: Failed it. Stupid Tony strikes again. Baker only had two tackles total. We thought he was due to break out, but not so much. Stupid Tony picked the wrong linebacker. If he would have gone with Dante Booker like I told him to, we’d be much better off now.
I did nail two of my three bonus predictions, though.
Season Total: 16 of 25 correct (64%).
Most people see “64%” and they view that as a failing grade. Well, those people are idiots.
Now it’s time to dazzle you with more predicting goodness. Be careful reading this at work because you might get a call from HR for fanning yourself while looking at the internet.
1. Mike Weber will rush for a season-high yardage total.
Mike Weber is just getting started this season. His season-high came last week against Rutgers and was just 44 yards. Urban Meyer needs Weber to become a larger part of this offense. That began last week, but the game got out of hand so quickly that there was no sense in risking good hamstrings. Maryland’s offense may keep them in the game a little bit longer — or at least the threat of the offense, anyway. Besting 44 yards should be easy enough. That doesn’t make this a weak prediction, however, because I’m calling for a season-high, which technically means that I am predicting something that has never happened before (this season).
2. J.T. Barrett will throw for 300 yards.
J.T. Barrett hasn’t thrown for 300 yards in a game since the Indiana season opener. In two Big Ten games, however, he has completed 35-of-58 passes (60.3%) for 590 yards with six touchdowns and zero interceptions. After this game, he should be averaging 300 yards passing in B1G play. I don’t feel great about this pick because I feel like there is going to be quite a big focus on the running game, but I also feel like the Buckeyes should hit some big gainers throughout the game.
3. Maryland will have a rush of 25 yards or more.
I originally went with 30 yards, but that’s asking a lot against a speedy Ohio State defense. Maryland has two running backs who can hit big plays, and even though they have contained Ty Johnson and Lorenzo Harrison in the past — 43 total yards rushing for Maryland last season — the linebacker play right now doesn’t lend itself to keeping dynamic cutback runners from hurting the defense. I pretty much view this as a sure bet 27-yard run by Ty Johnson that gets chased out of bounds by Jordan Fuller. (If this happens, I will award myself a double-prediction score.)
4. Ohio State will have at least eight tackles for loss.
Maryland is allowing 6.5 tackles for loss per game so far this season, but they haven’t run into a defensive front like Ohio State’s. The Buckeyes are also starting to blitz more, which is only going to help me here. Last season, OSU managed just three games with at least eight tackles for loss — though they managed 12 at Maryland. This season, they have had at least nine in every game except for Army. Losing Dre’Mont Jones does hurt, which is why I had to dial things down a notch.
5. A Buckeye will have a rush of 40 yards or more.
Honestly, Mike Weber could get his season high on one carry this week and it wouldn’t surprise me in the least. Ohio State has more 10+, 20+, and 30-yard runs than anybody else in the conference. When you get to the 40-yard mark, however, they only have two this season, which makes this a very bold and courageous pick. Maryland, by the way, leads the B1G with five. Fortunately for me, Maryland has given up two such runs this season, which ties Iowa for the most in the conference.
Bonus: K.J. Hill will score on a little out route from the slot.
We’ve all seen it. It will be the rollout to the right inside the 7-yard line or so. Usually it leads to a throw away, but not this time!
Bonus: A Buckeye will score his first career touchdown.
I have no idea who this could be. Jaylen Harris? Chase Young? Sean Nuernberger?
Bonus: Terry McLaurin will catch a pass of at least 36 yards.
He’s due. He’s overdue.